Wednesday, February 11, 2015

Prednisone, in poetry/bastardized song lyrics

When I find myself in times of trouble
And drag my ass to Dr. T
His prescription pad is ready
To tell me:
A higher dose of prednisone
Should help maintain stability.
Like a cat in a cone,
So gloomily,
I count the bitter pills to swallow
(The plastic bottle stares at me).
The side effects will follow,
Eating me. 

Prednisone, prednisone,
How you make me gripe and groan
I don't want to date you,
Prednisone.
Gastronomic misadventures.
Insomnia. Anxiety.
If one day I need dentures...
Oh, bite me.
My mind is in a nuclear meltdown
My pants won't fit an inch of me.
NOTHING RHYMES WITH MELTDOWN -
Leave me be.
Prednisone, prednisone,
I'll make sure you die alone
I really truly hate you,
Prednisone.